Into The Wild: Installment 4 (Homeward Bound)


My wayward child has returned!  I did not realize how little I missed her until she finally showed up.  I kid you not, in less than 3 hours our house looks like a bomb loaded with shrapnel of washable markers and books went off.  BOOM!  It’s like a rainbow exploded over a construction paper factory.

It is easy to forget how much damage a toddler can do to a house in a short time.  If I were a military man, I would be recruiting daycares for my soldiers.  But I am an eater, not a fighter…

Seriously, it is awesome to have my baby girl back home.  It has been a long (quiet) week with her gone.  Little B is still so young that he is in bed and asleep by 7:00 PM.  The rest of the evenings have been spent Skyping with M and GG.  It was almost nice to come home to the sounds of a three-year-old tearing my house to shreds today…almost.

I could swear that little B was a girl, or a fire alarm device with the way that he shrieked at the site of M.  He was so dang excited to see his big sis.  At first, I started to evacuate the house when I heard him going off, but soon realized that he was just overjoyed to see M.  It was a great moment…if I had ear plugs…

I have learned how quickly the habits and discipline that we have worked so hard to master with our daughter can be tossed to the wayside.  We are going to have to put some time in to get her de-GG-ized.  Apparently grandparents have no rules and young toddlers are allowed to rule the roost.  Well, M got a taste of this princess life and I hate to be the harbinger of bad news, but look out cause here comes the pain train…WOO! WOO!

All in all, we are very happy that our baby girl was able to sustain a week away from her omni-parents.  Had we been betting on how long she would last without us, we would be washing dishes at the Belagio.  She was a champ for six days, and it is kind of scary because she is very independent, and very intelligent.  Without proper guidance, this can lead to bad things…we don’t want to end up with a little politician for Christ’s sake.

Perhaps I will do a “reconstruction” blog chronicling the extents that we had to go through to get our sweet baby girl back to the way in which we had originally brainwashed her.  At least she his home now. Like the great Abe Lincoln once uttered, “Let the reconstruction begin.”

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About Generic Dad

Ex break dancing champion turned competitive eating loser. I am into prosthetic limbs, knife throwing, and I am a self-taught magician...I once fought Kimbo Slice to a draw, my belly button is known to seep gravy, which has come in handy on more than one occasion.

Posted on June 18, 2010, in Thoughts on Life and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

  1. i didn’t know abe lincoln said, ” let the reconstruction begin?” i thought his most famous line was, “fuck you john wilkes booth!”

    • You must be thinking of former president Abraham Lincoln. I am referring to Abe Lincoln, my neighbor. He said those words after I drunkenly drove my car into his living room after church a few Sundays ago

  2. oh, ok. you should really put up a picture of your neighbor to avoid any further confusion.

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