Into The Wild: Installment 3 (The End is Near)
Mom and Dad are really starting to miss our little angel. We both get home from work this evening and all that we talk about is that we both have gone from enjoying the spare time that we have had to wondering if GG has fled the country with our baby. We scarf dinner down so that we can jump on Skype with M to see how her day went (and to see if she shows any sign that she recognizes her birth parents).
First things first; I must congratulate Skype, or the operators of our respective computers for a first attempt connection this evening. So, we make the connection and after a several minutes of looking at the ceiling in GG’s house, we actually see M’s adorable face. The adorable face that is burned into our memories is not exactly what we were met with this evening on the computer, but under the greasy hair and yogurt-caked face we see our little baby. Both GG & M look equally zombie-like to their appearances last night, but something else is different tonight.
Our normally untamed spirit of a daughter is looking sulky and is kind of quiet. We tell her that we miss her and she is quick to tell us that she misses us too in a whiney, tired voice. This statement is followed by a hug…yes, she actually hugged the computer. It was the sweetest thing that she has done since she has been away from us. Mom and I exchanged tear-filled glances knowing that out daughter’s time at Club GG is nearing an end.
We are regaled with the tale of today’s adventures mostly by GG as M lie quietly on the sofa. Our little zombie must have just fed on some fresh brain (which has the same effect on a zombie as turkey does on a live human) because she was beat. GG spells out that M is, “M-I-S-S-I-N-G Y-O-U” and our hearts melt. In a wierd way, we feel loved by the daughter that so quickly abandoned us and hurled potty names at us just last night. Speaking of potty name-calling, you will be happy to know that M decided not to insult her dear parents tonight. I don’t know about you, but we are thinking that the end is near.
Of course, we are taking her lapse of love to be merely tiredness for the time being because we have been burned by this bluff before. We will see how M feels in the morning when she awakens to a full schedule of swimming, shopping, or raiding third world countries for their jobs (see Installment 2 https://genericdad.com/2010/06/14/into-the-wild-installment-2/) We have the eerie suspicion that we will be having bathroom insults hurled at us by day’s end tomorrow. Stay tuned…
Into The Wild: Installment 2
We are recovering after the rough shelling that we took on D-Day. M hit us with enough emotional shrapnel to make our hearts look like Swiss Cheese. Thankfully, and this is probably the only time that you will see me type these words, but we were able to go back to work today which helped take our minds off of our bruised parent-egos. We sit though dinner this evening mostly in silence. Each of us wondering what tonight’s Skype call with our wayward daughter is going to bring. Will she want scream and cry on the webcam begging to come home? Will she hurl bathroom word-laden insults at us again? It’s time for the call. (If you would like to catch up on Installment 1: https://genericdad.com/2010/06/13/into-the-wild-installment-1/)
Our stomachs are in knots as the Skype gods decide how many attempts we have to make before getting the webcams on both ends working. The gods say 3 times tonight (it was at least 5 times last night). Immediately we can tell that GG and M have had a long day. They both look like our Skype ringtone woke them up. Half-closed, drowsy eyes stare blankly back at us. We pepper them with questions about Day 2 and quickly find out why they are a heartbeat away from being zombies. They went to M’s great grandparents, they went to the mall, they went to build-a-bear. Apparently there is a store where you go and build your own stuffed animals. (What would the Taiwanese sweatshop workers say if they knew that rich Americans were out to get their jobs?). They went to the lake beach again, and finally they went to the park. A pretty lazy day…if you are a marathoner, or triathlete…
Once again M showcased that she does not possess the ability to miss her dear parents (or primary care givers, as it probably sounds in her mind) During the 2o-minute call we saw her little face a total of 5 minutes at best. The other 15 minutes consisted of GG’s glossed over haze-eyes all the while there’s a purple blur shooting to and fro in the background. One thing did improve in the fact that ony one of us gets to be called a bathroom part. Yes, it was me and I get called “Daddy Butt”. The rest of the conversation from M revolves around her panhandling for Mom and Dad to make funny faces. I think that we may be raising a future homeless person. She does not seem to care where she lives, and apparently she is already mastering panhandling skills. I say that she is mastering begging because when we sat through that 20 minute Skype call with our tongues out and making pig noses. If she were on the street she would have just earned a cool five bucks for “gas money”. Stay tuned for tomorrow’s installment which is now a quest for our daughter’s affection…